inspire in me the desire in me to never go home

Sometimes I think I am homesick. Then I feel confused because home is wherever *you* are, and this is our home now and it belongs only to us. I think I might be homesick only for memories, and most of them are of you. Maybe I am just homesick for falling in love with you again. Does uncertainty feel better than security to me?

Nothing about the place I come from means security to me. I have no truly good memories of childhood or even the few adult years I spent there except the ones of you- when I was trying so badly to leave. So... very confusing. I guess what I am feeling at those times is not actually homesickness at all, I'm just not yet able to articulate what the feelings are. I think sometimes I want to go back and find you again and again and fall...